I’m about to make a very bold statement. In fact, it a statement so bold that if you are currently drinking any liquids you might want to swallow whatever is in your mouth so you don’t spit it all over your computer screen. I’ll even give you a lovely little photo of a fern to look at while you swallow.
Okay, ready for the bold statement. I want announce to the world that I have perfect faith. My faith is 100 percent perfect I never falter, waiver, or question anything about my faith. See I told you I was about to make a bold statement.
Well, I guess I should clarify this slightly. While it is true that I do have perfect faith it is perfect faith is reverse. If I look backwards in my life, spend time digging around my past my faith is perfect. I know all that happened and why it happened. All of those events where I didn’t know what the result was going to be, I now know what and why things transpired.
My backwards perfect faith reminds me of all the times I watched Jeopardy growing up. The show used to be on when I got home from school and many days I would watch it and try to apply my Middle School knowledge to collegiate level answers. Most days I was able to hold my own with the contestants. I’m sure I would have failed the tests required to get on to the show, but while watching it from the comfort of my parent’s basement I did okay.
Once or twice every show, an answer would pop up on the screen I knew the question to but my brain couldn’t produce the answer fast enough. I would stare at the television snapping my fingers and uttering nonsense as I tried to come up with the correct question to the answer. When the answer was finally revealed by the contestant that actually knew the answer I would groan and say to my friend I knew that.
My faith is a lot like the familiar Jeopardy answers. When I am faced with a situation where the outcome is out of my control and I need to rely on my faith. I will walk around snapping my fingers with the answer to my quandary on my tongue. As my fingers snap, I will tear myself up on the inside with worry and doubt. I fail to trust fully enough in God’s plan for my life.
It is only after God’s will is revealed to me that I will look up to the heavens and just like I would do when I watched Jeopardy, will tell God, I knew that. I will forget all my struggles in coming to the resolution and I will secretly tell myself that I knew this was going to happen.
While my faith looking backwards is perfect, my faith looking forward needs work. It is something that I work on everyday, working on trying to make my faith looking forward as solid as it is looking backwards. Hopefully someday when faced with a question I don’t know the answer too, instead of snapping my fingers and faking an answer, I will sit quietly and let the One who knows the answer answer.