When I started my conversion process I felt like I was a square and Catholicism was a round hole. We all know from our childhood days of playing with wooden blocks that square pegs do not fit into round holes.
I remember when I was a small boy playing with a toy that had an assortment of different shaped wooden blocks that you would push through matching shaped holes. I don’t remember the name of the toy, just that it was one of my favorites. I quickly mastered the toy and could line up the square block with the square hole, the triangle with the triangle and even the hexagon with the hexagon. Well, to be fair, it was a pretty simple toy so mastery really isn’t something to brag about.
One afternoon I sat playing with the toy as Mr. Rogers sang in the background. I remember picking up the square block and lining it up with the round hole. I knew it didn’t go there, but wanted to see what happened. The two blocks were close in size and the square peg almost fit in the round hole. The only thing keeping the block from fitting were the square’s hard edges.
Being an industrious lad who liked a challenge, I decided to push the square block through. I walked over to my brown wooden toy box and rooted around until I found my shiny red plastic hammer. Tool in hand I was determined to get that square block to fit. I pushed the block in and then proceeded to hit that block with as much force as a young boy can muster. The block yielded under my determination and slowly made its way through the round hole.
When the block was about halfway through I was no longer able to drive it any further. It was stuck. I hit and hit and hit that block but no matter what I did it wouldn’t move. I turned the table over and tried from the other side but to no avail. Finally I did what any young boy does when they have a problem. I cried for my mommy.
I walked into the kitchen to show her what I had done. She took the mess I had made and with a mother’s touch pulled the square peg from the round hole. I looked the square peg over after she had handed it to me. The hardness and sharpness had softened through it’s journey. The block had been changed. I then looked at the round hole. It bore no marks from the ordeal. I walked back into the living room with the changed block and returned to watch Mr. Rogers.
There was a point in my conversion where I found myself stuck in the round hole. At first I had eagerly jumped into the process then one day all my forward progress stalled. I didn’t know what to do any more. I was stuck. I was too Lutheran to be Catholic and too Catholic to be Lutheran. I didn’t know what to do.
It was then that I joined my hands together and prayed for the Blessed Mother’s intercession. Soon I was being gently guided and brought back to Christ by Mary’s hand.
My conversion changed me, it softened the hardness of my edges. I sometimes look back on the whole process with amazement. For I have learned that with the Blessed Mother’s intercession a square peg can fit through a round hole.